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Thursday was Ivanka Trump night, chosen to introduce her father in a prime time speech that she kicked off by smiling robotically and stating, “Tonight, I stand before you as the Hide All The Beer The Sheep Shearer Is Here Shirt Also,I will get this proud daughter of the people’s president.” (I wonder how the families of the more than 180,000 Americans who have died of coronavirus so far feel about ”the people’s president.”) Ivanka is thought of as the woke feminist in Trumpworld because her father lets her give speeches and form meaningless initiatives. But she’s not actually given any real power. Ivanka is a straw man created to give the appearance of feminism. She checks a diversity box, like Ben Carson, the only Black member of the Trump cabinet. But ultimately, she’s the fancy housewife allowed to take a symbolic job.

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Ivanka Trump seems to believe she is her father’s second-in-command. But no one else does/Getty Images On Thursday, as the Hide All The Beer The Sheep Shearer Is Here Shirt Also,I will get this set-up speaker to the 2020 nominee, she gave a long speech that was meant to present herself as a sort of de facto vice president, at one point casually mentioning a meeting in the Oval Office she attended with the president and his top economic advisers to discuss “our historic tax and regulatory cuts” and that afterward the two of them talked privately about the “guts” it took to make those decisions. (While it’s nice that Ivanka thinks she’s her father’s second-in-command, literally no one else does, so she comes off seeming sort of delusional.) Also this was the fourth Trump child to try to explain to the American people that even though their father seems cruel, because of the cruel things he does and says, he actually loves his children very much. I don’t understand how loving one’s children (if he even does) in anyway negates his cruelty. As Trump himself would say, “It is what it is.”